Movie Review Time 2posted in Past Goodness on Feb 25, 2005
So I watch this movie called Hero today. Overall I think it was an alright flick. Overall. I do have some qualms. Don’t get me wrong; I love ninjas. I love swords. I love sweet sword fights. I do not, however, love people jumping around on wires. This is something I do not love. Ninjas, swords, sword fights? Love ’em. Jumping around being held up obviously by wires? LAME. It’s lame. It doesn’t work. If you’re watching a cartoon and the characters float around it’s ok. If you’re playing a video game and the characters float around it’s ok. If it’s in a live action movie: lame. I enjoyed said movie other than that. Just like Crouching Kitten, Hidden Pussy Cat, Hero was cool until the flying. I don’t care how much you’ve trained or how much you’ve meditated or how much Chi you have in your pocket, you’re not going to fly. If the Chinese were actually able to do all this then I’d be eating my Ramen with chop-sticks and I would have wore my big cymbal hat to the store today after I put on my wooden platform flip-flops. Hero gets a score of three fortune cookies out of five.