Grow Flowers

So Earth Week is coming up soon I hear.  This is one of my favorite weeks of the year.  Not only do we get to have hippies yell at us for burning delicious fossil fuels, but we may just feel bad about it for a minute or two because it’s the week to feel bad about it.  Other than getting a hippie lecture, we also get to let the little hippies inside of us out for a week to go wild.  For example, you could take a dump in someone’s lawn.  When the owner of the the house would come and freak out in your face, all you have to say is, “Listen, buddy, this is Earth Week, and I’m just trying to save that 1.5 to 3 gallons of water for every flush.  If you don’t want to help the earth, then that’s your prerogative, but I would like to keep this world green for my children and my children’s children – not that condone children having sex, but you understand what I’m getting at.”  Then you’d promptly clench your teeth a little bit and push out a little chocolate submarine.  *plop*  That’s what Earth Week is all about.