Two Ply

I see all these cartoonized toilet paper commercials and they get me thinking. Firstly, since when did cartoons ever have to take a poopie? I mean, where was Bugs Bunny’s bathroom? He lived in a hole in the ground. He couldn’t have an outhouse. I bet that hole stank. BAD. When Elmer Fudd would stick his head in the ground I bet he was in for quite a surprise. But back to the commercials: Have you seen the one with the little ladies actually quilting toilet paper? I wonder if they think that in mere hours all their hard work will be wiped away (obvious pun intended). And then there’s the commercial with the bears who find it necessary to use toilet paper hung from a tree branch. Since when was squatting too primative for the bears? They think they’re soooo smart trying to save the forests and all. I bet they haven’t perfected the process though; you know there’s a few dingleberries hanging around after they’re done. Stupid bears.